EXAMPLE #2 - Alan was attracted to a girl that worked at a store that the often went to. From her name tag, he knew her name was Elise. At first he would just maintain eye contact and smile at her as she worked the cash register and made change for his purchases. Her manner was very positive, and he was sure that she was interested in him, but he avoided any long conversations. He was always friendly and positive towards her, but the lack of conversation or "come on" kept her guessing.

One day, knowing that the store closed in an hour, he walked up to the counter and said, "Listen, some friends are coming over for dinner at my house. Would you like to join us?"

I don't even know your name!" was the reply.

"My name is Alan. Will you join us?"

She was shocked that she hesitated, but only for an instant. He gave her directions to his house, and then went home to call some friends to see if they wanted to come to dinner, so that his story would have credibility to Elise. The dinner went well. They got to know each other, and began dating.

Alan did many things right: 1) He kept her guessing about whether he was ever going to ask her out. 2) He asked her to come to a casual get-together on the spur of the moment. If she declined, it wouldn't have been as embarrassing as if he asked her out on a real date. 3) The dinner was a very casual affair giving both of them an ideal opportunity to meet and talk with no pressure. 4) He was able to portray himself as a fun-loving, spontaneous person who enjoys having people over for an evening of friendly talk and good food.