5 Steps to an Introduction to a Topless Dancer

Here's the basic way of introducing yourself to a topless dancer. Let's say that your name is Derek Evans.

1. Move to within two to three feet of the dancer, the most comfortable conversational distance.
2. Smile.

3. Focus your eyes on the bridge of her nose. This is tantamount to eye contact, but is easier to maintain.
4. Hold out your hand.
5. "Hi, you look nice. My name is Derek" Almost always, she will shake your hand and introduce herself. They'll be favorably impressed with your approach, indeed pleased that you came up to them. Your response then should be, "Nice to meet you...," using the person's name.

These groups function to lay all the ground work to help people lead a happier and fulfilled life. Examples of such groups are Silva Mind Control, Actualizations, EST, Transactional Analysis, Dale Carnegie courses, etc. A majority of these groups follow the pioneering work of Abraham Maslow and Carl Rogers in humanistic psychology, the therapy groups of the 1960's, and the eclectic Esalen Institute total experience.

These groups provide an excellent vehicle for one to meet other singles. A large number of people attending these training sessions are unmarried.

Human potential group workshops provide a relaxed atmosphere to meet others. You don't feel pressured to meet others like you would if you were in a singles bar. You're both there for a common cause and this brings people together. The people there are eager to meet others and the women are friendly. These groups create conditions under which friendships and relationships can flourish.

So, why not look into joining one of these groups? It can bring beneficial change into your life and give you new insights, not to mention meeting lots of new women and establishing new friendships.

If you are at leisure yourself, on a beach, in a restaurant, or on a park bench and an attractive girl walks by, you can take the opportunity to ask her to join you. You may want to put in some' 'filler'" talk if you don't get an immediate "Yes," (and she is wavering). Coaxing and kidding are good even if you get a weak "No."

"Aw come on, I need the company," etc., etc.

Dogs are wonderful conversation openers. Either the girl has a dog, which gives you the opportunity to admire it and ask its age, sex or breed. Then compare it with a dog you had. Introductions follow. Or, if you have a dog, chances are a girl will admire it. Even if she doesn't, you can reassure her jokingly, as you pass (or she passes you), that she need not be afraid, you will hold him tightly. Or he is very quiet (just like his owner). You can even solicit admiration of your animal. "Isn't he a beauty,” etc. Of course the advantage is that you have a common experience to share with the girl - the dog.

Outstandingly interesting cars, motorcycles, horses, or any other similar possessions can be used in the same way. Remember, girls are always interested (if they are available) in meeting new guys, and anything that gives them the opportunity is fine with them.

SENSUALITY TIP - It is very important that you are perceived by people as being sensuous and sexy - not as being a robot. You can do this through your voice, your body language, touching and eye contact. Get advice from your friends, observe others, or read up on the subject. It takes practice so don't be discouraged if you don't immediately feel comfortable projecting your sensuality.


Charm is a pleasing presentation of your personality. People who are around someone with charm feel an excitement and an enjoyment of being with them. Women are most definitely drawn to a man with "charm."

HINT #1 - When you are with a girls make sure that your body language is open and comfortable to her. Make sure that your eye contact is on her and not darting around the room. Make sure your facial expression is one of enjoyment in being where you are and doing what you are doing.

HINT #2 - Keep the conversation directed at her. Avoid talking about yourself. Keep asking her questions about her job, her education, her love life, where she lives, anything to keep the conversation directed at her interests. She will feel comfortable with a topic that she knows something about and will be flattered by your interest in her.

HINT #3 - Notice things about her: Her new hairdo, her new clothes, her glasses, the books she is carrying - anything that will show her you are observant, sensitive, and interested in her and things that she is interested in.

Not listening to her. Nobody likes to be ignored. Failure to pay attention to her while she is talking is an insult. It is a form of rejection and nobody likes to feel rejected. Don't be pre-occupied with what's going on around you and tune her out. Don't focus on other topless dancers stripping while she's talking to you either.

If she's talking about a subject you have no interest in, don't spend your time trying to come up with ways to change the topic of conversation to something that you enjoy talking about. Hear here out!

Don't make this mistake either. Let's say she's talking about a subject you're really interested in and you get so anxious to put your two cents worth in and comments, you spend your time going over in your mind what you are going to say rather then listening attentively to her.

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You'll always find plenty of single, nice women at church.

Many churches have begun to sponsor activities for singles. These activities range from dances and trips to lectures and discussions, from seminars on communication to workshops on sexuality.

If the church doesn't have a singles group, you'll have to use the conventional approach. Pick out a church and start going there regularly. Each time you go make it a point to sit next to or near the woman of your choice. Try to be near this woman each time you go to church. You'll become old friends before too long. The first chance you get, ask her if you could talk to her after the service. She will probably say yes and you'll be on your way.

Men sometimes do pull off a "moving" pick-up, with just a few words like, "Hi! Do you want to go to a party?" and other similarly direct approaches. But we feel you will ruin a lot of good opportunities that way, even if you might be successful sometimes. But it is up to you, the reader, to decide. Maybe you want to try such direct approaches a few times and see how you do. At least it is very simple and easy to do. We think that the chance of success of a direct approach depends more on the appearance of the man than other approaches. If a girl is very impressed by a man's appearance, she may well go along with it. But if a man is more ordinary looking, she may not. Such a man would do better to build up his case more slowly, in the more conventional way.

Probably all of us have known some man who is an absolute natural at picking up girls. Maybe it is a combination of boyish good looks, disarming charm, quick wit and super confidence. But he can walk up to any girl and she will like him right away, almost instinctively. He can approach a girl and, with just a few words, take charge immediately - make a date with her, take her off to a party, or whatever. He has instant momentum. He is not apologetic, but rather, positive or even aggressive with his opening lines. Of course you envy him.

But don't try to copy him, unless you have the same attractive assets he has. You probably don't have, or you would be using them already.

People like that usually have been successful socially for a long time; that is why they seem so natural. Probably as a child they learned they had good looks and started learning how to use them to get the things they wanted. They were developing their charm. For you to try and learn to compete with that type of "class" would be like a middle-aged man saying, "I'm going to learn to play tennis, and beat John McEnroe." Hyping up your confidence is one thing, but overreaching and falling flat on your face only destroys confidence. Be realistic. Don't waste your time trying to be someone you can't be. Settle for a little slower (and surer) approach. Develop a style that can work for you first. You may be able to improve your methods later.

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TIP - Lower your standards. Some men go dateless for months because they are shooting for the beauty queens. The fact that they are not with women makes landing one of those beauties even more difficult. If they would lower their standards and start dating, it would get them in circulation and make their social life advance much more quickly.

Don't be afraid to be seen with less attractive women. Other women will not notice that you are out with a woman that is, say, overweight. They will notice, however, that you are out with a woman who enjoys being with you. Hopefully, you will spend the evening enjoying being with your date too, because people will notice that also.

SIN #1 - Trying to prove to her that you're more intelligent than her. If you really are a highly intelligent person , just keep it to yourself. Don't try to show how much smarter you are than her.

Now, I realize that a lot of topless dancers lack formal education, their mentality may have been altered by drugs, a dysfunctional family, or they are somewhat naturally stupid. Forget all this and relate to her on her level.

You will be able to communicate with her much better and if you can't carry on an intelligent conversation with her you are off to a bad start. Also, you may intimidate her by putting her intelligence down. She may not care to be around you and just get up and leave.

SIN #2 - Interrupting her during conversation. This is a quick way of becoming unpopular with her and even being disliked. Interrupting her when she's trying to say something is an insult and can hurt her feelings. If you are doing this, it stems from your ego problem of wanting to feel important, to be heard, and to be recognized.

Don't commit this deadly sin and just put your ego aside and concentrate completely on what she is saying. Focus all of your undivided attention on her and don't butt in. Hear her out. If you listen closely enough, you might even learn something of value.

If you commute by train, bus, plane, subways, etc., there's going to be golden opportunities to meet women. These places are filled with eligible, pretty women.

The whole trick to meeting them is to make it a point to take a seat next to them. This way you've got her pinned in and she's not going anywhere unless you scare her off. If you're on a train or plane, she doesn't have much choice.

All you've got to do when sitting next to her is to just start talking to her. Talk to her about anything and turn on that charm of yours.

If you take a bus or train to work or school, pick out any female riders you'd like to meet. Select one and make it a point to sit near or close to her. Do this each time you see her and after seeing you a few times you'll practically be old friends, even if you haven't spoken to each other.

If you deliver your opening line to the girl knowing you have plenty to say afterwards (until you introduce yourself) you will be much more confident in both your initial approach and your opening line.

Now don't get the wrong idea here. We do not mean you have to ramble on at length before you introduce yourself. It should be a very short speech, at most 10-20 seconds. Sometimes it will not be necessary at all; it all depends on the girl's reaction. In many cases she will respond immediately to your opening line, in a friendly, warm way. You should then introduce yourself immediately. We are concerned more with the occasion where the girl is a little hesitant. You should only continue with the "filler" until she seems to be accepting the idea of meeting you.

If your “filler" attempt makes you sound like you are struggling with the situation, it doesn't matter. If you are squirming somewhat, trying to justify your actions in trying to pick up the girl, this is fine. You are talking - that is the main thing -and she is listening. You are really not trying to convince her. She probably agrees with you anyway. When she shows signs of accepting your attempt to meet her, you should then proceed to introduce yourself. Your looking a little worried after your opening line is actually very good for your case. It makes you look more real, more believable. The girl tends to think, "This nice guy is worried about my being offended when he is trying to meet me. Yes! I do agree with him. He should be able to talk to me if he wants to." It tends to put her on your side, with the conventions of society the villain. She should then give you some encouragement, and you can introduce yourself. Unless she is unavailable, and she should tell you that quickly enough.

Really! Talk, talk, talk. Keep talking. That's what it's all about. So have your ammunition ready.

It is a very good strategy to build up a number of female friends. These are women with whom, for one reason or another, you are not interested in a relationship that goes beyond friends. These are girls that feel comfortable and safe around you, and vice versa. Most all women enjoy having male friends, and so they will value you. The reason that this situation is such an asset to you is that:

1. The main reason. You will be seen with women which is good for your image.
2. One of the best ways to meet women is through women - especially women that like and appreciate you.

3. Sometimes there may be parties or social events that you would not want to attend stag. A female friend would come in handy for these situations.
4. Being around women who are friends will make you more at ease and confident around other women. Your actions and words around women will become natural.
5. There is always the possibility that one of these friendships may blossom.

SIN #1 - Criticizing her in public. This is a big no, no. Nobody likes to be criticized in front of others. So, if there are others around, refrain from telling her she's dead wrong about things or pointing out a terrible mistake that she has made.

This will make a bad impression on her, especially if you don't even hardly know her. Nobody likes to be embarrassed in front of their friends, other topless dancers, etc.

SIN # 2 - Making sarcastic remarks and making fun of her. Don't make the mistake of making any sarcastic remarks toward her. Most people don't appreciate sarcasm. Just be optimistic and upbeat towards her no matter what's going on. You'll be a lot better off. And whatever you do, don't make fun of her. If you make fun of her, if you belittle and ridicule her, or if you make a fool out of her, especially in front of others, you'll have her as an enemy for the rest of your life. She will never forget this incident or forgive you. People don't like their ego deflated and their pride hurt. Do the opposite and give her lots of praise.

This is an overlooked great place to meet sexy women. Using some special techniques, you can be successful in meeting women here. Here are the techniques:

1. If you see a woman across the way you'd like to meet, just simply use the waiter or waitress as a messenger. Now, instruct him to bring this woman a drink and a note saying, "Hi! My name is Don from across the way in the blue shirt and curly hair and I'm irresistibly attracted to you and I'd love to meet you. Will you come over and join me?"

2. If you see a woman you'd like to meet at a counter or table with an empty chair, just make it a point to sit next to her. Then you ask her, "Excuse me, I've never eaten here before and I was wondering if you could recommend something good to eat?" This breaks the ice and then you follow up with your conversational skills.

3. As a variation to technique number one, ask your waiter or waitress to ask the man if she'd mind if the man in the blue shirt and curly hair across the way joined her.

Wednesday, July 10, 2013 | | 0 comments »

A few good filler lines that give you at least a weak additional excuse for stopping the girl are:

"Well, I just like to meet new people."

"You know, this is a good opportunity to meet new people," (beach, sporting event, or any occasion).

"I just like to talk to interesting people." (Then tell her why she interests you.)

All this may sound unimportant. You may think that you can easily think of something to say. Well, if you are quick-witted enough, you may be able to. But otherwise it is best to have your ammunition ready. If you are inexperienced in trying to pick up a girl there is a lot of pressure on you. It often happens that when you try to think of something to say your mind comes up with a blank.

We believe that this "filler" talk is more important than the opening line, particularly for a novice. It is easy to learn a good opening line, and just stop a girl and say it. But men who have tried pick-ups unsuccessfully always say that the big problem comes after the opening line, when the situation becomes awkward and it just didn't seem appropriate yet to introduce themselves. What you are grasping for at that point of the operation is common experience with the girl. After all, if you already knew the girl you would have no problem finding something to say. You would have plenty of common experience to talk about. But you don't. She is a complete stranger. So one of the best subjects of conversation is the common experience you are having at that moment –your attempt to meet her. Some philosophical discussion of that subject fits into the situation very well (at that instant, anyway.

Being seen with women is probably the single most important thing you can do to help your image. Women are very willing to take another woman's word for it. In other words, if you are with a girl you must have something going for you.

When you are seen with a woman, it says all this without you uttering a single word:

1. You must have things going for you.
2. You must know how to treat a woman.
3. You are going to be hard to get. After all, there is more than one girl vying for your time.
4. You are something she can't have. People are afraid of commitments so who better to fall in love with than someone she can't have?
5. You appeal to her powers of seduction. Women love the chase while men are more interested in the trophy. If a woman sees two men at a party - one with a date and one stag, she will be most attracted to the one with a date. He is the one that stimulates her powers of seduction, and her competitive nature to prove her superiority over other women.

SIN #1 - Bragging about yourself and your accomplishments. There's no faster way of driving topless dancers away from you than by constantly talking about yourself and your own great accomplishments.

Forget about yourself. The whole art of conversation with a dancer is to become interested in her rather than trying to get her interested in you. Remember that most people are interested in themselves morning, noon, and night. Never forget this fact. After all, why should a dancer be interested in you unless you are interested in her first. Just put your ego aside and concentrate solely on her and her interests.

SIN #2 - Talking too vulgar and crudely. In the beginning, when you meet a dancer and you start talking sexual and making vulgar remarks, you are going to turn her off and you will get nowhere with her.

Don't tell her things like, "You sure have a great set of tits." or "show me your pussy." This is showing her lack of respect and she won't appreciate it. They want to be treated like a lady and not some whore.

Another mistake is propositioning her for sex in a crude manner with statements like, "Let's go f--k," or "I sure would like to f--k you."

Treat her like a lady and don't act like a horny dog with uncontrollable hormones. You'll make a lot better impression on her by keeping cool and calm and non-sexual and non-threatening.

You will stand out favorably from the other guys she's used to being around that act like animals.

These are great places for meeting women and salesladies and are literally just crawling with lots of young attractive women. Another factor in your favor is that women outnumber the men usually three to one.

Meeting salesladies is very easy. They are usually fairly attractive and are usually bored and would welcome a man like yourself approaching them and brightening up their day. All you have to do is simply pretend you are shopping for a gift for your mother or sister and ask her for assistance. After you have spent some time with her talking and making contact, ask her out to dinner on her lunch break or after she gets off.

As for the shoppers in the stores, let me offer some approaches:

When you see a woman loaded down with purchases, offer to help her carry her packages. This has drawbacks though because she might not trust a stranger carrying her packages. She may fear that you'll run off with them. It's worth a try though. All she can do is say no and think of the possibilities if she says yes.

Another approach is to walk up to a woman pretending you need help with a purchase. For example, if you're in a jewelry store, approach a woman and say, "I'm shopping for a watch for my sister and I was wondering if you would try this watch on so I can see how it looks?" 99 out of 100 times she will help you. After that, just turn on your charm and conversational skills and ask her out.

A good place to approach women is at the cosmetic counters. Women tend to hang around this area of the store more than any other location. Make-up and perfume are very important to women and she will tend to take her time in this department. Your approach? Look for a woman trying on some perfume and get next to her and give her your opinion of that exotic scent she just tried on. Don't forget to approach the salesladies also!