How to ask for a date

 

How to Ask Women for a Date

There are good ways and bad ways to ask a single girl out. The bad way to ask a girl out is, "Would you like to go out with me?" By saying this:

• You set yourself up for rejection. She might say no.
• You imply that she would be doing you a favor by going out with you.
• You imply a formal date. You are making a move on her. The pressure is on her.
• If she says "no," you are never sure whether to ask her again for another time. Was it, "No, I don't want to go out with you," or "No, I want to go out with you but I'm busy that night."
• You literally sound like a junior high kid asking a girl out on his first date.

The right way to ask a single girl out is, "Let's get together and do something sometime." Memorize these words. By saying this, you give an impression of a casual meeting. No big deal. Friends getting to know each other. Not a formal date. If you say this, her response will let you know whether she wants to date you or not.

If she is interested, she will respond in the positive, but also her tone will be positive. The expression on her face will be positive. She may even lead the conversation to making a specific time to do something. If you do get a positive response, you can either pursue the conversation and arrange to meet on a casual date or leave it until the next time you meet. You know she wants to get together and she will be waiting, now that you have teased her with talk of a date but offered no specific plans. You are being elusive and playing hard to get. Her anticipation works in your favor.

If she does not want to go out with you, her verbal response may be "no" or it may even be "yes" to save your feelings, but her tone, her facial expression, and her desire to drop the subject will let you know she is not interested. Don't pursue it further.

The beauty of this exact phrase is:

• You are not set up for rejection. After all, you have not really asked her out. You've made a statement.
• You are throwing out an offer. The implication is that you are doing her a favor. She is not doing you a favor by going out with you.
• It implies a casual get-together to get to know each other, not a formal date.
• You know for sure whether she wants to date you or not.
• You aren't asking her. You are making a statement which says something about you. You are the type of person that likes to do things with friends, and of course she would like to participate. After all, there is no pressure. You are a confident, friendly, fun-loving person who is doing things.

Now re-read that phrase. "Let's get together and do something sometime." See how much better it is than asking a question that may get you a wrong answer?

P.S. This article is an excerpt from our best-selling book, "A Man's Guide to Women."