Let me give you a few pointers if you're slow-¬dancing in nightclubs and by all means try to dance to every slow dance because of the physical contact involved.

Just as in fast dancing, immediately start introduction procedures. Open up by saying, "My name is_______ What's yours?

When slow-dancing, try to hold her as close to your body as possible. Gently now! Don't squeeze her like an octopus. When moving your right leg, gently brush her inner thighs. While dancing, gently squeeze her hand and see if you get any response. If you do, continue with the next step. Start rubbing her back with your hand. At this point if she starts rubbing your shoulders, neck, or back and starts grinding her crotch against yours, you are on your way.

At this stage of the game it's time to try and kiss her. Begin kissing her neck and work your way up to behind the ear, then the ear lobe, then kiss her on the lips. If you've gotten this far, chances are you're going to become intimate with her tonight, if not later for sure. If you have tried all these moves and you do not get any response, don't be concerned about it. Some women are reluctant to show any affection towards a total stranger. This is quite common, so don't jump to conclusions thinking that she's cold or not interested in you.

If she is busy, but there are no strangers within earshot, you can ask her name and introduce yourself, and ask her if she is busy later. This is suitable with waitresses, receptionists, office workers and some others. A date can be made then, or later.

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In both cases mentioned (with the girl busy), if she should say "No," you should be a little persistent.

You should say, "Oh! Come on now. I only want to talk to you for a minute or two. You can't be that busy, all the time." Her "No" may have been a knee jerk reaction, because you took her by surprise. She will usually relent, unless she has a strong feeling about not wanting to meet you.

It is a very good strategy to build up a number of female friends. These are women with whom, for one reason or another, you are not interested in a relationship that goes beyond friends. These are girls that feel comfortable and safe around you, and vice versa. Most all women enjoy having male friends, and so they will value you. The reason that this situation is such an asset to you is that:

1. The main reason. You will be seen with women which is good for your image.
2. One of the best ways to meet women is through women - especially women that like and appreciate you.
3. Sometimes there may be parties or social events that you would not want to attend stag. A female friend would come in handy for these situations.
4. Being around women who are friends will make you more at ease and confident around other women. Your actions and words around women will become natural.
5. There is always the possibility that one of these friendships may blossom.

When you first meet a topless dancer, do these important steps to create a bond. Be the first to extend your hand during your initial greeting. While shaking hands, give her a warm friendly smile and say, "Hi, my name is _____." That's the best way to open the channels of communication between you and the dancer. She will be impressed by you shaking her hand also because most men don't. You are showing her respect and making her feel special. It shows that you're a warm & friendly person and it helps to lower her defenses. It creates an atmosphere of receptivity between you and the dancer.

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When you shake hands, be sure your hand acts as your private diplomat. Use a firm grip to show strength and friendliness. A grip that's too hard seems aggressive. A grip that's too soft suggests that you're weak, retreating or indifferent. As soon as you feel her grip relax, break the handshake. If it's a very quick handshake it indicates an obligatory handshake. I'll bet you didn't think handshaking was such an art.

This is very important! After you have finished dancing whatever you do, don't let her get away after thanking you for the dance. Just simply say, "Can I join you for a drink?" Also, you could say, "Can I talk to you about something?" After this statement, she will say, "Talk about what?" Then you say, "I'll tell you when you when we sit down." After this, just start mak-ing conversation. Also, if she doesn't have a table and she is just standing like yourself, just say, "Can I talk to you for a little while?"

So, what you do after you finish dancing can determine the future of your whole night and whether you're going to become intimate with a woman or not. What I can't figure out is these men that dance with a woman and don't even look at or talk to her while they are dancing and when they finish, he says, "Thanks" and just walks away. Needless to say, you don't meet any women this way.

So when you have finished dancing, move right in for the kill. Don't hesitate, just proceed immediately with determination that you're going to make contact with this woman.

If the girl is working, like a waitress, receptionist, salesgirl, etc. several different situations can occur. First, if she is not busy or occupied with someone else, you can use a fairly basic approach, like, "Hi! looks like you have time on your hands! Aren't you usually busy this time of day?"

Then after she replies, you can get right down to business. Say, "You know, when I was walking past, I noticed you, and I decided I’d like to meet you. My name is. ..., what's yours?" If the girl has a co-worker nearby, within earshot, don't worry - just proceed as if they weren't there.

If she is busy, and you can't get to talk to her without other customers hearing, about the best thing you can do is say, "I'd like to see you later. Would that be possible? What would be a good time?" Then the girl won't be too embarrassed, since the customer doesn't know whether you already know her or not. A date can be made then, or later.

Being seen with women is probably the single most important thing you can do to help your image. Women are very willing to take another woman's word for it. In other words, if you are with a girl you must have something going for you.

When you are seen with a woman, it says all this without you uttering a single word:

1. You must have things going for you.
2. You must know how to treat a woman.
3. You are going to be hard to get. After all, there is more than one girl vying for your time.
4. You are something she can't have. People are afraid of commitments so who better to fall in love with than someone she can't have?
5. You appeal to her powers of seduction. Women love the chase while men are more interested in the trophy. If a woman sees two men at a party - one with a date and one stag, she will be most attracted to the one with a date. He is the one that stimulates her powers of seduction, and her competitive nature to prove her superiority over other women.

This is an excerpt from our best-selling book, "A Man's Guide to Women."