Finding Someone Special

Setback and Failures

Food for thought...So, guys what are your current dreams and desires for finding a girlfriend for love and romance? Maybe you've had this same dream and goal in the past and things did not work out like you had planned. So, maybe you just threw in the towel and put that dream on hold.

We all have had setbacks and failure in the romance department. It's all a part of playing the dating game until you find the right person for you.

Take this perspective - Today is a new day. I challenge you to dig deep and revive that dream of finding someone special. So what if your old dream of finding someone died. Well, just dream another dream. Don't just settle for being lonely and not having someone to love.

How to Give a Woman a Compliment

Giving Women Compliments

If the girl doesn't respond to a straight compliment, you can try a semi-humorous production, such as: "You know, when I was a little boy I saw a beautiful bicycle in a store window. It was a shining red with chrome fenders. It had a - chrome headlamp, a genuine leather seat, a flashing red and yellow taillight, a speedometer, handbrakes, a rear view mirror, and a musical horn that played a tune. It had everything. It was the most wonderful bicycle I had ever seen. I asked my father to buy it for me, but he couldn't afford the price. I often went by that store window just to look at it. I wanted that bicycle so much. Well! I want a date with you just as much as I wanted that bicycle." All this should be said dramatically, but smiling all the time. You are telling it as a kind of joke. You can use variations of this -a little pony, a sports car or anything else.

If the girl won't warm to you even after your attempts to draw her out and your compliments, she might still be a little shy. You could try this: "Say! There is a nice little coffee shop around the comer. Let's go for coffee." Then, while you walk along together (and at the coffee shop), you can chat casually about things along the way, or other small talk that presents itself. If you still can't get her to respond (and you haven't lost interest yet yourself), you should ask her for a future date, or get her phone number and try again at another time. Of course, if she refuses the coffee invitation, or your date offer, you should probably give up. Mostly, girls will respond more easily than this, but I have described a difficult case to illustrate some of the different tactics you can use.

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Getting Women to Talk to You

How to Get Women to Talk

Up until this point you have done all the talking; you have opened a conversation with her, given her a reason for your approaching her, and introduced yourself. Now it is time for you to invite her to do some talking. The best thing is to ask her about herself, e.g., "Anyway Joan, what do you do around here?" The usual mundane questions such as where she lives, where she works, are quite acceptable at this stage. You are really just marking time, and probing. An interesting train of conversation will often develop out of these ordinary subjects. But even if it doesn't, it serves good purpose. You are learning about the girl. You start to get hints of how she feels about things. Also, it makes her somewhat more at ease. Admittedly you are putting the spotlight on her by making her talk. But, she feels more appreciated if she is putting some of her own ideas into the encounter.

You may feel foolish asking a question like "Do you live around here?" I mean, it sounds like a corny line. But I don't worry, that is the way the game is played. It is an "accepted" conventional thing to say, such as when you say "Hello! How are you?" to someone.

The girl knows that it is hard for you to come up with anything pertinent right away. She can tell that you are trying to meet her. So, if she approves of you, she will cooperate with your efforts to get a conversation going.

You are trying to draw her out. But she may still be self-conscious and only give very short answers to your questions. In fact, the whole encounter, from your opening line to her telling you where she works, and where she lives, could take as little as 20 seconds, if she were playing you short, refusing to be drawn out. So then you have to try something else.

Key to Success with Women is Knowing What They Want

What Do Women Want?

This Question has totally wiped out many a man's mind since the dawning of time. Knowing what women want and how they like to be treated is the key to your success.

Women can be fickle creatures and their moods are easily changed. Luckily for men most women are greatly impressed by the smallest gestures of sincerity and sensitivity from men. The old cliche of bunch of flowers or box of chocolates will nearly always work for you in terms of setting the scene and creating a receptive atmosphere.

The way in which men and women think is totally different to one another. Even if we arrive at the same conclusions we will have taken very different paths to get there. This must be understood and accepted by you if you intend to have any success.

How to Read Body Language of Women

Reading Body Language of Women

Generally speaking, placement of the hands or legs in closed positions, standing back a little, placing the body or head sideways or at an angle, and averting the eyes all tend not to be indicative of positive commitment.

But reversals of these stances, such as arms and legs in open positions, arms used to gesture, standing closer, standing square on (most of the time), meeting the other's gaze (most of the time) indicate positive commitment.

It is not necessary to have all the significant movements and stances listed for you to understand them. If you think for a while you can visualize many of them. If you watch an actor on stage (or TV), and you are looking out for it, you will see body language used extensively.

In fact, in the craft of acting, body language is one of the most important skills. Body language is usually performed unconsciously in response to our feelings. So, an unskilled actor, not realizing this, and not having any real feelings relative to his role, neglects the body language. His performance thus seems clumsy and unconvincing. He speaks his lines without the appropriate gestures, actions and stances.

But a skilled actor either has the ability to consciously perform the body language, or he pretends he is actually living through the experience of the scene. This latter is sometimes called "method" acting. The actor then actually experiences the feelings of the role, and his body language comes naturally. He is thus more convincing in his role.