Should You Have Sex Early in a Relationship?

Becoming physically intimate too soon can be fatal to a relationship. It can shatter the slowly developing friendship and trust between the two of you. It magnifies and distorts feelings, clouds judgment, and superimposes cruel reality on hopes and dreams ("Is that all there is?"). It narrows options and introduces tensions and pressures into what was a joyous and carefree acquaintanceship. It damns you for  lack of respect for the woman, and for lack of discipline on your part. It is begging for trouble.

Getting to know a woman, "touching" her is critically important in a relationship. Physical contact at the wrong time can intrude, hinder real understanding, block communication.

You can learn more about each other by joining your voices in song, by becoming one in music and lyrics and poetry, than by sleeping together. You can get a deeper sense of communion by sharing a meal than by sharing a bed. Just holding hands or a gentle kiss can easily be more explosively effective in linking the two of you than having sex.

Physical intimacy implies commitment, responsibility, a sense of permanence. It is a promise. The two of you should be fully committed to each other before you seal the bond with lovemaking. Sex should never be undertaken lightly, without a full understanding of its implications...and consequences.