Becoming physically intimate too soon can be fatal to a relationship. It can shatter the slowly developing friendship and trust between the two of you. It magnifies and distorts feelings, clouds judgment, and superimposes cruel reality on hopes and dreams ("Is that all there is?"). It narrows options and introduces tensions and pressures into what was a joyous and carefree acquaintanceship. It damns you for  lack of respect for the woman, and for lack of discipline on your part. It is begging for trouble.

Getting to know a woman, "touching" her is critically important in a relationship. Physical contact at the wrong time can intrude, hinder real understanding, block communication.

You can learn more about each other by joining your voices in song, by becoming one in music and lyrics and poetry, than by sleeping together. You can get a deeper sense of communion by sharing a meal than by sharing a bed. Just holding hands or a gentle kiss can easily be more explosively effective in linking the two of you than having sex.

Physical intimacy implies commitment, responsibility, a sense of permanence. It is a promise. The two of you should be fully committed to each other before you seal the bond with lovemaking. Sex should never be undertaken lightly, without a full understanding of its implications...and consequences.

For Shy Men Only

 

What  is  shyness?  Webster's  defines shyness as being "uncomfortable in  the presence of  others." For the  shy man  this refers  to being uncomfortable in the presence of the opposite sex.

               

Shyness  can be  a crippling  mental handicap and it's consequences can be devastating in the following ways:

 

1. Shyness breeds negative feelings like anxiety, de­pression, and loneliness.

2. It encourages you to think too much about  yourself and to be over-preoccupied with your own reactions.

3. It will limit you in  voicing your own opinions and values and speaking up for yourself.

4. Shyness hinders  your  thinking  and  ability  to communicate effectively.

5. It has an unfavorable bearing on how others will e­valuate your personality.

6. Shyness  makes  it more difficult for you to meet new people, make friends, or enjoy potentially good times. Thank goodness, shyness can be cured and overcome!

As an example of shyness, at  every nightclub you will find the  shy man. You'll see him just standing around all night, being afraid to approach a  woman and start up a conversation or even to ask a woman to dance. So what  happens? They  get frustrated and leave  the club.  They keep  coming to  the nightclubs and repeat the same routine. They stand around wishing they could meet someone, get frustrated, and then go home  frus­trated and depressed.

               

You  can overcome your shyness  and you "must" if you're going  to  nightclubs, etc.  This  kind  of  social setting  can be most threatening and anxiety-provoking if you are a shy man. This kind of setting will only aggravate your shyness condition if you don't take the appropriate steps to overcome your shyness.

               

In order for you to promote this change yourself, first you must believe  that change  is possible. You must  really want to overcome your shyness condition. Last, you must be willing to commit time and energy to take  action and  to risk  some temporary  failures in initiating change  procedures that  can lead to long-­term  success.  To  sum  it  up  you can change if you believe you can but it takes work...hard work.

This topless dancer really likes to party, drinks heavily and loves to get high on drugs.  Is this good for you?  It can be to your advantage because of her being a free spirit she may go party with you after she gets off work.   She's not likely to just party with any guy.  She's got to be attracted to you and feel safe with you.

If all you do all night is make sexual advances towards her, it's unlikely she will go party with you.  These girls are just like any other normal girl in that they don't want to be used for se

 

So many men get the wrong impression about topless dancers.  They think that just because she takes her clothes off in front of men that she will be an easy lay.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  I know their occupation is considered sleazy, but the girls do have their dignity.

The party animal is one of the most fun to be with.  She's very open-minded and very friendly.  Your chances of getting a date with this type of dancer is more favorable too.  If you do date her, don't be the possessive and jealous type.  She may date a lot of men, being that she's loose and carefree and loves to party.  You're going to have a problem with this if you're the jealous type, so be forewarned!  If you determine that she's the party animal type, this should be your strategy: Buy her drinks and get her loaded.  She will be more receptive to your advances.  If she's loaded enough she may even give you free table dances.  If not, perhaps you could negotiate a buy one get one free offer.

TIP- If she's loaded, always ask her to show you her bush while she's dancing.  Being that she's drunk, she just may do it for you.  When a dancer is loaded she may do things she would not normally do.  Always remember this and use it to your advantage.

As the dating continues, you must continue to apply every principle we discussed in the section on your image. Be elusive, mysterious, hard to get, exciting - everything.

TIP #1 - Seeing a girl that you have just started dating, more than once a week is pushing it. Any more than once and you may be appearing over anxious. Even if she is the one calling you and initiating the effort to see you more often, don't. If she is calling you, then you are in the driver's seat. Play hard to get and make her work for your time. She'll appreciate you more when she has it. And don't feel guilty about turning her down. Simply say, "I'd love to but I'm busy tonight." No more explanation should be given. Let her sweat it out. It is important that when you turn her down, you express the fact that you definitely want to do things with her, but you are just too busy with prior obligations to see her that night.

TIP #2 - Never hangs on the phone for hours as if you have nothing better to do. Call, be pleasant, get the purpose of the call over, and excuse yourself.

Here's an article I found on the usenet that was posted by an anonymous author which will open your eyes to some head games single women play on men:

Another typical female behavior is to test you at the very beginning of your relationship to see if you are going to put up with her garbage. Actually, she is testing you for two reasons:

First, she needs to find out the limits of what you will view as "her acceptable behavior." She does not know you well enough yet, she is in unfamiliar territory. And that can be very "scary." So, she needs to find out what behavior is expected or accepted of her. The uncertainty makes her feel very uncomfortable, totally out of her, "Comfort Zone."

Second, she needs to find out, she must find out how strong and sure of yourself you really are. Some women can be very insecure. The very last thing a woman really wants and needs is an insecure and weak nice guy who is easily manipulated and controlled by her.

Therefore, she really wants and needs a strong man who will control and dominate her and tell her what to do, a man confident enough to stand up to her when she needs it, a man who will make her feel secure, a man who will give her that sense of security she so desperately needs.

She sometimes cannot get that sense of security from herself because she may have so little self-confidence and self-esteem. She may even believe that she has very few talents and abilities - except for her physical features and beauty. It can be very frightening. Therefore, she tries to get that sense of security "by osmosis" from you. Plus the added benefit that she won't have to worry about the hard decisions. You will make them for her.

WARNING! If you are tolerant and patient (like all nice guys) you will not pass her test, she will walk all over you, she will leave you and go after another jerk because he looks so uncontrollable, so untamable, so strong and therefore, so desirable to her.

I was kind of hesitant about posting this article because I don't like to focus on anything negative, but I need to make you aware of head games that single women will play on you.

Your  hair is very important  to your looks. Most women like a  man  with  well-groomed  hair.  I  wouldn't advise you to wear your hair real long either. This is out of style and turns most women off.  Seek professional  help  to  deter­mine  which hairstyle is becoming  to  you.  Try  a  perm  if  you like. It can attract women like  crazy, especially if it's  thick and full. So, be daring and get a permanent and see if you don't  get  more looks from  women.

A word about  jewelry. Jewelry is in, so do  wear attractive jewelry to make yourself more becoming and attractive. Just don't overdo it. The multiple gold chains and medallions around the neck are definitely out now, so don't look like a fool by wearing them thinking it makes you look like a "Macho Man." Just one gold chain around your neck is sufficient and quite attractive. Just make sure it looks expensive and not cheap and tarnished.

A word about watches. Invest some money in an attractive watch. It makes a bad impression when you wear a cheap and ugly watch.

If you really want to  turn a woman off, go  out in public  with your  hair uncombed,  stringy, and dirty, unshaven and wearing wrinkled,  dirty clothes. Some  men just don't take enough pride in  their appearance and think they can  pick up women  looking like a bum.  Well it just doesn't work that way because  a woman likes a man  to be well-groomed. In public is certainly no place for a shoddy-looking man.

If you  happen to be obese,  resolve here and now that you're going to get rid of all those ugly pounds. With  the  proper  diet and  exercise,  you  can trim yourself  down  to  where  you won't be embarrassingly fat.

It's a known fact that if you're a fat slob, your chances of meeting women are pretty slim. Obesity  turns most women  off.   This doesn't have  anything to do with  looks but it's worth mentioning. Be  sure to  take a  shower or bath regularly.

Veteran Dancers

This is a topless dancer with a lot of experience and has been dancing for ten or more years.  She's more mature mentally, physically, and emotionally.  She knows all the ropes and is a seasoned veteran.  She's an expert at manipulating men for drinks and table dances and she's rather aggressive.  She can be every seductive and make you want to reach for your wallet.

Your best strategy for trying to score with veteran dancers is establishing a friendship first.  She's heard all the pick-up lines, men offering her gifts, trips, etc.  Hitting on her right out of the gate probably won't work well with this type of woman.  Gain her trust and friendship first and take it from there.  A word of advice - I'm not saying don't pursue veteran dancers, but you'll have a lot better luck with the young and inexperienced dancers.  There's one advantage to the veteran dancer and that is she is likely to give you a very seductive and sexually stimulating table dance.

P.S.  Remember to always ask a dancer when you first meet her, "How long have you been dancing?"